I “should” but I won’t, and I know it. A case for “Could”

I “should” but I won’t, and I know it. A case for “Could”

May 12th, 2011 // 3:21 pm @

A very common correction/suggestion you’ll hear from a coach, mental health professional, Mr. Miyagi or Yoda, goes something like:

“There is no should, there is no try, only do or not do”

This is amazing advice, but often said without any connection as to “why”.

Watered down as so many other things that are passed down from Eastern philosophy to Hollywood to that pretentious annoying guy at the office etc..

Think about it, why wouldn’t we want to say “should or try”?

Because we are programming ourselves for failure.

Regardless if it’s a new idea that resonates with you or something you already knew you wanted to do, when we say “should” our mind goes right to the negative. You might as well just come right out and say

“I should BUT…(insert excuse here)”

Otherwise you’d just answer “yea… let’s do that or Nah, I don’t like that”

So why do we do that? Why are we programming ourselves like that?

When we know we “should” do something but we don’t do it, that means there is something blocking us from dealing with it. Should & try almost always coincide with,

“I want to, but for whatever reason, this makes me feel uneasy!

There is something there, something stopping you, a hesitancy and usually the idea just stops dead, right there.

I “should” but I won’t, and I know it.

I should lose weight, I should find a job I love more, I should spend more time with my kids, I should, I should, I should.

Should means you’ve hit an emotional road block.

When you say “should” you want to examine it and really FEEL for a minute. Why is it should? Why isn’t it “YEA… gonna do that next week”:

What is stopping you?

This is where your friendly neighborhood coach can really come in handy. Especially if they have been lucky enough to graduate from the Center for Coaching Mastery at www.Coachville.com. At Coachville, Coach Dave Buck (sort of my own personal Yoda) has put together a curriculum that is revolutionary. Right up there at the top of the list is learning how to help people pursue inner freedom through Flow & Connectivity. We help you get past those “should” and “try’s”.

But short of running out and getting a coach,

Which I honestly think everyone should be doing. This world is spinning 100 times faster than it did just one lifetime ago and having someone to help keep you accountable and focus on what’s really important to YOU in YOUR life, is crucial like never before. You wouldn’t believe how much a coach can save you in prozac bills 😉
(ok stepping down off the soap box)

what is one simple thing you can do?


Using could evokes possibility and not shame. Could gives you a natural moment of reflection. Could, shakes your tree a little and makes you stop and think.

“Hmmmm, I “COULD” do that, couldn’t I!

Hopeful, positive and wholly in the moment. Try it for a week and see if it doesnt give you a new perspective?

We are such prisoners of our environment, we can’t even see how stuck we really are. Just a tiny shift like this is sometimes enough to make big changes in our life.

Don’t be afraid to grow, don’t be afraid to question yourself… to ask why?
Life is too short to be on remote control.

You are exactly where you should be… NOW WHAT?
Coach Bo

Category : Story Archive &Truth

One Comment → “I “should” but I won’t, and I know it. A case for “Could””

  1. Christy

    12 years ago

    What makes one above others is self confidence. Growing up sometimes mean being outside our comfort zone.


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Bo Blaze is the "Alternative" life coach. Specializing in the Entertainment Industry, Alternative Relationships & Sexuality and anyone else who's life is just a little bit left of center. He has 20 years of experience in the music industry and has worked with a variety of entertainers and touring musicians from the "most high profile" to the "completely unknown". He has vast experience with alternative lifestyles & communities including, Polyamory, Leather, BDSM, Kinky, Queer, Fetish, Adult, Gay, Lesbian, Transgendered, Transsexual, Crossdressing, LGBT, Leather Family, adult entertainers, sex workers etc. Bo's own struggle and subsequent success fighting his food addiction makes him an excellent choice as a Bulimia and Food Addiction Coach.